Shower With Good Fortune… And With Frank Body’s Green Tease Scrub

I don’t tend to rave about body scrubs too often since my skin is dry, delicate, and apparently rather thin, which means most exfoliants wind up making me feel like I’m being mauled by a bear — or, in the best of cases, being wrapped burrito-style in coarse sandpaper, then shaken around like a maraca for maximum abrasion.  But, as with all things in life and beauty, there are a few brands that consistently release body scrubs that are — miracle of miracles! — gentle enough for my skin and which actually do reveal the smoother, softer, and more radiant skin they promise to help achieve. For the past four or five years, Frank Body has earned its place as one of my trusted body scrub purveyors. However, I’m mostly accustomed to their coffee scrubs, and as a perpetually hyper-caffeinated, tornado-like person, I appreciate the peppy scent of my morning (and afternoon) go-go juice of choice. So, when they announced the release of their new, limited edition Green Tease Scrub ($19.95 at FrankBody.com), I wondered if it could compare to its java-centric predecessors. To my surprise, this scrub actually surpasses its predecessors in all regards: texture, smell, and performance.

Let’s start with texture. The Green Tease Scrub marries ultra-fine, almost milled coffee seed and green tea leaf powders with slightly coarser sugar and salt grains, then incorporates soothing and hydrating natural oils like sesame seed oil, avocado oil, ginger root oil, soybean oil, and coffee seed oil. This magical mixture produces a scrub that’s almost flour-like in texture  — think of the finest sand you’ve ever touched while on a beach, and you’ll get an idea of the primary texture. Sprinkled within, however, are larger coffee seeds that offer just a touch more friction, allowing for a more in-depth exfoliation that’s still gentle and never ever painful.

One thing that struck me about this scrub is how easy it is to use. I mean, sure, we all know the ABCs of using scrubs (apply to damp skin, massage using circular motions, then rinse), but in practice, the process rarely goes that smoothly. Oftentimes, scrubs are so densely packed that they’re hard to scoop out of their respective jars or bags. Another common scenario: the scrub slips through your fingers, winding up all over the tub rather than on your bod. And then there are those jars and bags that aren’t waterproof so that, after 1-2 uses, the scrub is literally submerged under water that somehow seeped into the packaging. None of these unfortunate scenarios occurred when I used the Green Tease scrub. I could easily scoop out the desired amount — not a huge mound but also not a baby spoon’s worth! — and it would stay on the palm of my hand as I worked it onto different sections of my body. Once I was working on an area of my skin, the scrub would stay in place, allowing me to really massage the region, rather than falling off. And when I rinsed the substance off, I didn’t have a goopy, filmy residue on my skin, but I did notice it felt moisturized and soft.

As for the smell, it’s beyond delicious. There are hints of coffee and green tea, of course, but you can also detect the sweetness of licorice and the slight kick of ginger.

And the results? Well, my arms and legs have never looked this good on a cold December day. See, every ingredient in this scrub has a purpose. The antioxidant-rich green tea calms the skin and prevents inflammation while also protecting it against free radicals. The ground-up coffee beans polish off dead surface skin cells and reveal a brighter and smoother layer of skin, plus they stimulate collagen production, increase circulation (and hence minimize any swelling), and help to diminish the appearance of cellulite. The avocado oil is rich in fatty acids that hydrate the skin, prevent and minimize aging signs, and leave it significantly softer. Both the honey and sugar work as natural humectants, drawing moisture to the skin and locking it in, plus honey has antibacterial properties and helps to leave skin clearer and more luminous. The licorice root extract, meanwhile, is known to help even out skin tone, while the ginger root oil soothes redness and helps to treat and prevent acne. The gotu kola extract boosts collagen production and protects elastin and hyaluronic acid from breaking down, helping to retain skin’s bouncy and youthful appearance.  The soybean oil is rich in vitamin E and helps to soften and smooth skin. Think of each ingredient as one of the X-Men — each is individually powerful but, together, they’re an indomitable force. There are no slouches in the X-Men, and there are no filler ingredients in this formula.

As if all the above reasons weren’t enough for me to be smitten with this scrub, then there’s the ultra-cheeky packaging. For this scrub, Frank Body embraced mysticism and so there’s a fortune-telling theme that resonates throughout: from the all-seeing eye motif adorning the front of the pouch to the words stamped on the back (“Legend says: girl who showers in green tea gets lucky in life”) and the tarot card tucked inside the scrub.

There are 5 different Tarot Cards in circulation, and I’m now on a mission to collect them all because, hey, they’re way funnier than Pokemon cards — and I get to keep my skin looking fabulous while I remain on my quest to find the whole quintet. Thus far, I’ve learned from my one tarot card that, in the event of a zombie apocalypse, I’ll be better dressed than the walking dead. Phew! Can’t wait to see what other predictions await!